'Scouting has the beauty of being the anchor in the storm'

What the anti-gay policies stole from a generation of young men.

Photo by Dim Hou on Unsplash

When I think about why I do this work—why I write this newsletter, and why I’m writing my book—I think about the younger version of myself.

Growing up, I was not athletic or popular in school. I was a nerdy, artistic kid who struggled mightily to fit in with my male peers especially. In that environment, Scouting was in many ways my refuge. It was one of the few places I felt like I fit in and knew how to succeed, where the rules made sense to me.

What I’ve come to discover doing this work is that I’m far from alone. Nearly every LGBTQ+ scouter I’ve interviewed has told me something similar: That in a world of toxic masculinity and homophobia, Scouting felt like a safe haven.

That is, of course, why the anti-gay policies were particularly cruel. It was entirely possible for queer kids to gravitate toward Scouting—find a home there, excel there—only to find out after the fact that their identity rendered them an outcast.

This is true of James Dale, who learned about the anti-gay policy only as he was being kicked out for being gay, and of so many others. And this is why I find the story of Scouting’s gay membership battles so compelling: Because for queer kids all over this country, the policies determined whether or not they had a place to belong.

The reason I’m telling you all of this is because I can’t stop thinking about a quote from a recent interview I did with John Halsey. He’s been around Scouting for more than 60 years, has served as president for what was then the Boston Minuteman Council (now Spirit of Adventure), and has held various regional and national leadership roles.

Halsey saw the anti-gay policy as a mistake from the very beginning, and captured the pain it caused an entire generation of youth, in a way that I simply could not have said better myself:

“We added to a challenging time for these young men. That was unnecessary. And they had an anchor called Scouting, which helped them weather the challenges of growing up, because there are challenges in growing up. And we're talking about sexuality, that's obviously one of those challenges, but there are many challenges of growing up.”

And here’s the part that got me:

“Scouting has the beauty of being the anchor in the storm. And the sad truth is, we denied a certain group of boys and men—young men—the opportunity to hold on to that anchor.”

Go back and read that again.

Scouting was the anchor in the storm for me, and for so many people I’ve talked to. I think that’s important to remember; it’s something that can get lost in the culture war of it all.

At the end of the day, the gay people who fought for inclusion in this organization wanted one thing: A place to belong.

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